How to chuck away my social anxiety?

Social anxiety is one of the most common reasons why people seek out the help of a therapist. 

Many individuals with social anxiety struggle with feelings of overwhelming fear and nervousness that can make it difficult to perform even the most basic of social activities.

From job interviews to starting a new hobby, social anxiety can cause crippling realistic scenes in an individual's mind. It often ends in a vicious cycle where an individual skips an occasion due to social anxiety and then feels even worse due to having bailed out, yet again, at a friend's birthday party. 

Social anxiety is caused by a tidal wave of memories, emotions and feelings and for this reason it can often feel overwhelming to the person suffering from it. 

Cognitive therapy has been shown to be an effective approach for individuals who are seeking a way to manage their social anxiety. Cognitive therapy is a type of therapy that focuses on changing the way that someone thinks about a particular situation. Through the use of structured exercises, clients can learn to identify the negative thoughts that are causing their social anxiety and replace them with positive, empowering ones. 


One of the most important things that cognitive therapy can do for people with social anxiety is to teach them how to challenge automatic thoughts.  These are thoughts that people have in response to a given situation, and they happen so quickly that people may not even be aware that they are happening at all. 

For example, if someone with social anxiety is walking into a crowded room, their automatic thought might be, "Everyone is looking at me and thinking I'm weird." This thought could then cause the person to feel extremely anxious and self-conscious, possibly causing them to want to leave the situation altogether. 

Through cognitive therapy, individuals can learn to identify their automatic thoughts and then examine the evidence for and against them. 

For example, the therapist may ask the client: "Is it really true that everyone in the room is looking at you and thinking you're weird? What evidence do you have to support that thought?" This kind of questioning can help the person to recognize that their thoughts are not always accurate, and that they may be based on assumptions that are not necessarily true. 


Another important aspect of cognitive therapy is learning to recognize and change negative self-talk. This is the inner voice that people use to criticize themselves, often without even realizing it. For someone with social anxiety, negative self-talk might sound like, "I'm so stupid for saying that," or "I'm never going to be able to make friends." 

This kind of self-talk can be extremely damaging, as it reinforces the person's negative beliefs about themselves and their abilities. Through cognitive therapy, clients can learn to recognize negative self-talk and replace it with positive, encouraging self-talk. 

For example, instead of saying, "I'm so stupid for saying that," the person might say, "That wasn't the best thing to say, but everyone makes mistakes." 


By changing the way that they talk to themselves, individuals with social anxiety can begin to build more positive self-esteem and self-confidence. 

Overall, cognitive therapy is an effective approach for individuals who are struggling with social anxiety. By learning to challenge negative thoughts and replace them with positive ones, clients can overcome their anxiety and begin to enjoy social situations again.


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